BIRTHDAY RIOT!

On Monday night, the mob descended upon Kingsford for an Italian dinner to commemorate the birth anniversary of Mamma Seh Learn. Mamma arrived there right on time with her hench woman Kettle Rena, armed with 3 bottles of wine to knock out the fabulous boys. Her intention was to pick the boy she wanted as the sacrificial lamb for the night. I was quietly confident I would not be picked because of her fervent and open dislike for Chinese food.

After our usual hellos and air kisses ala Paris Hilton, we proceeded to sit down and take over the restaurant with our thunderous voices and goose bump inducing conversation topics.

As usual, the conversation always ends up on the single topic that fascinates ALMOST everyone at the table. Sex. With declarations like "Yes, pineapple juice makes it sweeter...", "Yes, I like being whipped and slapped around...." and "Do you always have to come when you have sex?" punctuated by rapturous laughter blaring from our table, its not hard (pardon the pun) to see why our table was the centre of attraction for the entire restaurant. Much like watching Sex and The City, with the volume put up to 99. The waitress even joined in, placing an electric pepper mill on our table which made Mamma Seh Learn very, very excited indeed.

As usual, me and Matt tend to fade into the background when conversations elevate to that level. Not that we are frigid, and I assure you we are anything but. As an attached monogamous couple, we don't really seem to fit in with these graphic interpretations of sexual reality that our friends' lives seem to revolve around. All we can do is to take it in (pardon the pun again...). Monogamy is never an interesting topic when you are talking to single, young (I use this term loosely), carefree individuals. That's just us though, we never take offence. In fact, we are more than happy to sneak in a few more glasses of wine un-noticed while everyone is engrossed with the re-enactment of Firry's oral talents. It was a great night, and Mamma Seh Learn went away with enough rechargeable batteries to make her camera and vibrating best friend very happy. No more late night trips in her pajamas to 7-11 when her batteries run flat.

HAIRPI 46TH BURFDEY, MAMMA SEH LEARN!