The Crappy Post

This week let's talk about crap.

Last Friday, we had some Very Important Person visit our workplace. He was visiting the our educational institute but decided to drop by our research centre for a look. Yeah, just a 10 minute browse around, nothing much yeah?

Crap.

We had to start "preparations" 2 weeks before. These were the preparations that we and the school had to do for the 10 minute visit.

• Showcase 3-4 products which we have successfully introduced into the market (fair enough)
• Write down exactly what we were going to say in front of the VIP and have it approved (crap)
• Have 2 practice runs with the head of the school's exec committee so they are sure of exactly what you're gonna say (crap).
• Boss asked for 4 more practice runs before the 2 practice runs with the head and the principal (crap)
• Our lab is next to a raised platform and has been there for the last 60 years. Somebody decided it was too dangerous and decided to put permanent railings up in two days. Seems like the VI P's safety from this one single visit is more important than the students or staff walking along it on a daily basis (crap).
• There is a dark walkway along the VI P's path which lead to our lab's backdoor. That was deemed too dark and dingy for the VIP to look at. What did they do? They sealed off the walkway with a wooden board and painted it exactly the same colour as that of its adjacent walls. They did a very good job, I must say. You wouldn't know there was a walk way there. You also wouldn't know there are 300 burning students behind the blocked walkway in the event of a major fire (Ultimate crap!).
• They immobilised the whole of our schools cleaners to clean every spot he should possibly touch on his route to our lab (crap)
• They rented , yes rented! some potted plants and strategically placed them on the path on route to our lab, cumulating into a burst of flourishing colours from 4 different kinds of flowers in a blatant display of specially arranged landscaping hiding the dull walls of my laboratory (crappy waste of taxpayer's money)
• We have pleaded and begged with management to repair our floors which had cracked terribly from the badly applied epoxy for about 3 years now. There were no action taken. Until now. All it took was news that the VIP foot would be resting on these cracked floor surfaces and the coating was hurriedly done over the weekend before he arrived (aristocratic crap).
• The whole thing was over in 10 minutes (holy crap, could have stayed longer to make all the trouble more worth it!)

Friday night, I had a lesson in physiology and chemistry. I learnt that one should not consume too much alcohol on an empty stomach in a hot and humid country. 6 glasses of wine, 2 glasses of vodka orange and 1 glass of long island iced tea emptied into an empty stomach equals stumbling home after you get out of a cab coupled with feelings of regurgitation and endless sweating. Not to mention the heavy head and half wasted day after. Crap!

To carry on with the crappy theme. Watched a real crappy movie on Sunday. Monsters vs Aliens. Forked out $13 to watch a 3D version of it as well! Crappy waste of my hard earned money. Dreamworks have lost it with this one. It was fun at first, the 3D effects, but the novelty worn off after a while. Boring storyline, I had to force myself to laugh on 3 occasions, the other times, I was just counting down the time. It was a short movie, 90 minutes, but felt like it was 3 hours. Its like a B grade animated movie. Those who haven't watched it, don't even bother buying the DVD. It is Crapola!

Other than that, it was quite a nice weekend, except it was fucking hot! Crap weather for the last few days, my air con has been working overtime.......

My New Obsession

Holy Freak, how good is Masterchef Australia??!!!!

I am utterly obsessed with this show. Great food, great looking contestants, nurturing chefs (as opposed to self absorbed, attention seeking judges who's only aim in life is to put people down i.e. Kyle, Simon and Todd, take note)

I am a few episodes behind (only onto episode 10 now...) but I found myself cheering for the contestants and even feeling their immense pressure. I love the way the show is being presented and the surprises it throws up each week....Congratulations Channel 10, you haven't done good reality TV for a long long time now and ditching Big Brother was the best decision you've ever made.

I am so inspired I am now designing my dishes and I have the sudden urge to cook again, something I haven't done for a while now I'm back in Singapore where mum holds fort in the kitchen.

I think I might use David's kitchen to whip up a storm soon and I shall present pictures of my creation on here soon....

I don't think I could ever survive in a professional kitchen though. Even though I am a food technologist, my understanding of what flavours goes with what and variation of textures and colours are not quite there yet. Sure, I can whip up a mean home cooked meal, but to plate it up and serve it in the restaurant would be another thing. And the pressure, I think I would crack as soon as they ask me to pick out my ingredients from the pantry.....

Anyways, I shall get cracking soon with my new creations. Stay tuned....

P/S : Iron Chef, you must be enjoying the show so much too! And with some of the dishes you've created, I reckon you could be on that show!

And Chef George...geeez...turns my top soil......

I can't believe I just typed that.......

33 years and 1 week

Got a bit reflective today looking back at my 33 years and 1 week.....

What have I achieved?

Monetary wise, I have been average...my bro brought us to the unit that he bought after our mother's day dinner last night (which was fantastic by the way, haven't had a proper family dinner other than during Chinese New Year for many many years now). And just to clarify, our family sometimes celebrate Mother's Day a week later just to avoid the crowds and the extra charges they pile on for special occasions. Back to the unit, it looked great, nice location, nice level and a nice big balcony, which is always a prerequisite for a nice unit. I haven't got a unit, a car or loads of cash. I am what you would term as "comfortably poor".

I am a competitive person by nature (Taurus), and I am very security conscious (Taurus), but not against my family members.

Sure, I wished I had more money in my bank account, I wished I had a car (got to get a licence first), and I wish I have the 2 million dollar mansion my boss just built. Its funny, I'm surrounded by people who seem to have it all, yet I'm not jealous.

Is this due to old age, am I softening like cheese and wine? Have I lost my drive?

Maybe its because I have a partnership with one of the most wonderful person you can find on this planet (no names required).

Maybe its because I have some real friends from Australia (namely Sydney, Wollongong and Perth) and Singapore. Sure, they make up no more than the fingers I can count on my two hands, but would you rather have 100 fake air kissing ass smooching friends or 1 true friend holding your hand on your death bed (ok, sorry getting a little morbid here....)?

So what have I achieved?

I have plans, but it'll take time. I won't be stuck in this "comfortably poor" zone forever. And make sure all you friends come along for the ride.

Because without you all I am and have nothing.

Party Animals

Shiny swirling lights, I like, feels somewhat Woodstockish.....

Even the duchess flew in to celebrate our birthdays....ohh...how nice....

All in all, I counted 12 bottles of different spirits, 1 cask of wine (our trademark), and 2 bottles of champagne (courtesy of the duchess). Throw in a good mix (although somewhat repetitive) of music and you have a recipe for a night of debauchery.

The punters received a very warm welcome from the bar staff...

Of course, not forgetting the fabulous little food which I spent about 1 week visualising and the party was rocking! I wished I had taken more photos of the food, they were so so cute!!! By 6:30pm, everyone was happily slurring, the barman (me) was getting harassed left, right and centre, there was murder on the dance floor, lots of D&Ms and atmosphere was well and truly gay....in a happy sort of way....

There was hugging.......

Surprisingly, amidst all the excitement, there was not even a drop of alcohol spilt or any glasses broken (of course we had to thank the reject shop for having such classy plastic drinking tools).

Then we had to bring out our party trick.

Challis Avenue.

Always a hit, it truly added a touch of celebrity to the event. All we were missing was some paparazzi.

and a tiny bit of S&M

another random happy silly photo......

Anyways, do enjoy the photos and thank you all for the great time we had. Thanks also for the well wishers from Sydney, NZ and Singapore. We appreciate all your lovely SMSes, emails and phonecalls....

For those of you who forgot...well....

The hungover day after, the entourage of royal highasses trotted their way into the royal carriage on a cross country train ride into the wilderness known as Fremantle.

Instead of going for her favourite bratwurst sandwich, the Duchess decided to go down and dirty to try some fish. It appeared she loved it so much, she was licking her fingers after. "Finger licking good" she said. "Tastes like chicken"

Its not very often you get 2 members of the royal family from different countries together. The Duke of Wellington, Duchess of Roselands and a plate of pheasant food...ahhh....priceless......What's missing here is "Teeeeeaaaa...."

Prince Wong of Toa Payoh is the paparazzi darling. With his cool demeanour, rogue-ish good looks and his famous sunnies, he's a hit with the boys and the girls. But no one (except members of the royal family) ever gets within a foot from him. Notice those two bodyguards in the background who seem to blend in so well with the crowd?

Here's the Duke of Wellington looking as suave and as cute as the day he was born, back in 1924...